In defence of blurbs
Blurbs and blurbers get a really bad rap. When someone sticks their neck out and says something positive and interesting about a book before it gets published, that person is putting his reputation on the line and yet increasingly this act of generosity is viewed with scepticism. It's assumed that there is an ulterior motive at play (typically that the blurber is a friend of the author) but my experience of such quotes is that they are almost always borne out of a genuine love and admiration for the work in question.
A blurb can be a great thing, a verbal key that unlocks the hidden treasure awaiting within and an invaluable reference point for the wandering browser in a bookshop. Take the following quote from DBC Pierre:
"A perfect salute to imperfection...in this extraordinarily lucid work, Tusset lays glorious waste to integrity, political correctness, personal hygiene, and - in a character who smokes three joints before breakfast and pleasures himself at the sink of his local bar to get the best value from prostitutes - probably creates the ultimate flat-mate. This isn't a book. It's a month of Friday nights out." DBC Pierre on Pablo Tusset's The Best Thing that Can Happen to a Croissant
Pierre succinctly captures the decadent joy of this Spanish debut better than any of the subsequent reviews the book received on publication. When I sent the novel to Pierre he had recently won the Man Booker with his startling debut, Vernon God Little, and it struck me that he would not only appreciate Pablo's novel but, as importantly, people who liked Vernon God Little would like The Croissant too. It didn't make Pablo's novel a bestseller but that's not the point - what matters is that more people read this hugely entertaining novel, Barcelona's answer to A Confederacy of Dunces, than otherwise would have.
If you rewind back one book you can see what blurbs adorned DBC Pierre's debut, my favourite of which is Andrew O'Hagan's equally over the top and memorable blurb for Vernon God Little:
"You want to know what this terrific book is like? It's like the Osbournes invited the Simpsons round for a root beer, and Don DeLillo dropped by to help them write a new song for Eminem."
That one certainly grabbed my attention and encouraged me to read DBC Pierre's comic masterpiece.
However, blurb fatigue does creep in for most writers and it is totally understandable when they decide to hang up their blurbing pistols. DBC has already reached this point, feeling overwhelmed by the sheer number of requests and the pressure put upon him by publishers (like me!) to endorse the next bright new thing. Margaret Atwood decided some time ago that she needed to step out of the ring and did so in the most elegant and witty of ways, composing this poem that she sends to anyone seeking a quote for a new book:
Letter sent in reply to requests for blurbs
(I blurb only for the dead, these days)
'You are well-known, Ms. Atwood,' the Editor said,
'And we long for your quote on this book;
A few well-placed words wouldn't bother your head,
And would help us to get in the hook!'
'In my youth,' said Ms. Atwood, 'I blurbed with the best;
I practically worked with a stencil!
I strewed quotes about with the greatest largesse,
And the phrases flowed swift from my pencil.
Intelligent, lucid, accomplished, supreme,
Magnificent, touching but rough ,
And lucent and lyrical, plangent, a dream,
Vital, muscular, elegant, tough!
But now I am aging; my brain is all shrunk,
And my adjective store is depleted;
My hair's getting stringy, I walk as though drunk;
As a quotester I'm nigh-on defeated.
I would like to be useful; God knows, as a girl
I was well-taught to help and to share;
But the books and the pleas for quotes pour through the door
Till the heaps of them drive to despair!
So at last I've decided to say No to all.
What you need is a writer who's youthful;
Who has energy, wit, and a lot on the ball,
And would find your new book a sweet toothful,
Or else sees no need to be truthful.
Such a one would be happy, dear Editor, to
Write you quotes until blue in the brain.
It's a person like this who can satisfy you,
Not poor me, who am half down the drain.
So I wish you Good Luck, and your author, and book,
Which I hope to read later, with glee.
Long may you publish, and search out the blurbs,
Though you will not get any from me.'
Have you a favourite blurb? Or want to point out a blatant piece of blurbing nepotism?
Or think they should be banned (except for dead people!)?
Would love to hear.
